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A full moon in Libra: where the Sun is in Libra and the Moon is opposite in Aries…

What a polarizing conversation. Libra the peacemaker; Aries the fighter. Libra longing for partnership; Aries demanding sovereignty. Loving Libra wants nothing more than to be in love and married; Aries is the part in all of us that idealizes being alone and free—yet still thinking something is wrong to want to be single/alone… Hello, Lady Gaga (an Aries), who symbolizes feminine freedom at all costs.

It’s always fascinated me that the well-seasoned married guy or gal imagines what it would be like to be single, or with a partner who was ‘different’ than who they are with—dreaming of the person you ‘should’ have been with…while there are some single, ummarried people who imagine what it would be like to be in love and living with their dream partner. This is the source of all romance novels and great love stories. Welcome to a Libra fantasy.

‘The grass is always greener on the other side’ is the slogan for this polarization. Some wish they were with someone different, some wonder why they never found the ‘one’.

It’s not true: the grass is not greener. Remember that song: ‘Love the one you’re with’? Do it with clarity and strong decision making.

This full moon reminds all of us that indecisiveness (Libra) is opposite clarity (Aries). We need to be in or out—with full conviction, not the vague, ambivalent kind of love for this full moon.

Conviction is needed in love, politics and business. Take a stand. Hold your truth. Make a decision. If you can’t, ask for help.

Libra inspires coaches, counselors, and therapists. This is the part in all of us that needs to be transparent and to talk, with the support of someone asking you the hard questions: Am I honest? (Aries) Am I in love and willing to give my all? (Libra) If not, how do I tell the truth to myself?  (Aries) Who will help me talk to myself with clarity? (Libra)

During quarantine, I had some major relationships shift (I wrote about this months ago). This last week, on the Equinox, I had a chance to finally sit eye-to-eye with my ex—to complete. This is the hardest and most important thing to do when something is over. To be clear (Aries) as we end something with transparency (the high road of Libra).

We do not know how to say with kindness: this is over. To neutralize that truth is an art. No blame, no guilt, just ‘oh look, we are over’.

I have always found it amazing that while once you were standing in front of your loved ones saying ‘I DO’, all dressed up in that flowy white dress, proclaiming your devotion to love…and then years later, you find yourself driving to the lawyer’s office to tell them how awful that person is and that you are done (Aries). Pissed off and disappointed, you forget where the whole thing began. From love to disgust in mere years. Libra love versus Aries the warrior.

And here we have the full moon’s conversation, leading to this god-awful question: How do I take full responsibility for my life? No blame, no finger pointing…just saying ‘I am done. I learned my lesson. The expiration date arrived. Bye bye and thank you. We had a great ride. I adore who you are AND…kindness.’ No need to assassinate, judge, or diminish that personjust a clear ending.

We just passed a Jewish Holiday called Yom Kippur. It happens during Librain the Jewish culture, once a year, weeks after the New Year, you look behind and are asked to forgive whoever you had a bump with in the last year.

You can write them, go over to their home and have a peaceful (Libra) conversation to restate the new year with a fresh start. I did that with my ex. We completed in peace and love. What a beautiful exchange it was.

There are others that I have not yet found closure with. No matter—this conversation of the full moon (plus this beautiful Jewish holiday) begs the question: Is there anyone you need to forgive or be forgiven by? It’s an inside job, it doesn’t require the other person. This is the time for such a practice. I am doing my work. I hope you do the same.

Preparing for your death (next month’s Scorpio topic) happens by being sure no one behind you has been left with a pile of karma that you did not address. This full moon in Libra is a time to look at such a topic.

Other than that: have a great celebration. Any excuse for a Libra or Aries to party and they are in.

I am in love with this energy. It is strongly in my chart. To be real, in love or not—but real—is the art of every Libra’s life.

What I know for sure: I love writing these newsletters, and my Libra would love some feedback. Tell me about your relationship with endings and peace? I am so curious.

Blessings,
Debra

56 Comments

  • andreachesleymt@gmail.com' Andrea says:

    My ex whom I dated for 6 years and haven’t seen in 5 years is working on a house down the street from me..I pass him everyday but he doesn’t see me or know I live so close. I’ve thought about saying hi but twice as I was walking up he disappeared, either driving away and walking away. So I’m thinking this closure is meant to be done internally with myself. He is still not over it so perhaps not a good time for our energies to meet again… What are your thoughts??

  • gmtriath@gmail.com' Ginger Miles says:

    This letter was (and your previous ones) so insightful and practical for me to do the work (inside job). Your writings have helped guide me, and often conincide with dynamics I was aware of so it helps me confidently listen to my intuition. Being new to astrology, this is super helpful.

  • diwilmot@yahoo.com' Diane Wilmot says:

    What a great lesson! I just broke off with a man I had opened my home to for a year, in order to help him and his 6yr. old daughter not be homeless. It soon became an utter nightmare! So, I moved on. Being a widow for five years, after a 30 year marriage, made it hard to sign up for a dating site. I almost immediately met the perfect man! A doctor with all the sane interests and hobbies! But, he is coming out of a divorce just last February, after she cheated. He is a Taurus and I am an Aries. We are going on a ten day trip together, so this will be a great time to put down our past hurts and embrace the new opportunities!

  • Oh this resonated so deeply with me. I have never left in anger, it has always been “oh my time with this person is done” I love you , we have shared so much. I still love you just not in an intimate kind of way. I hate labels and boxes and definitions. Why oh why can we not just be open and interested and curious and kind and compassionate with EVERYONE out there..
    I am Pisces with Aries Rising.

  • pandolfi_cindy@emc.com' Cindy says:

    Love this – I am Aries and my husband a Libra 🙂

  • Jennyfrankdog@gmail.com' Jenny Kendrick says:

    Oh, man. I have a sun in Aries and a moon in Libra and when I figured out I had a moon in Libra I realized why I am so indecisive (very unlike Aries), I am a living contradiction. We’ll see if I have the balls to to “take full responsibility with my life” during this full moon! Yowza. It takes me a looooooonnnnng time to figure out when I’m done. But when I’m done, I’m done for good. There is no turning back.

  • aedennon@gmail.com' Anne D. says:

    So very happy I found you, Debra Silverman. I am eagerly learning from your instagram posts and now, newsletters. This is actually the first I’ve clicked through to. And then it kept clicking. I love your message. Wisdom ! First I am dumb, then I am wise.

  • Catherinegmsis@gmail.com' Catherine Millard says:

    Ha ha as you know this is me. But interesting right now all those questions are in my head. Should I do I want anything. I like being alone it teaches you nothing more when you ve done it most of your life where I fall down is being a people pleaser nervous partner. Ok it’s true it’s because I picked horrible men with big lessons I didn’t always learn the first time. Then I became invisible to the opposite sex (who I’m interested in). They don’t notice me I rarely notice them. And if I do it turns me into knots. As far as resolution. It can’t always happen peacefully. I don’t tend to get angry or even and instead don’t stand up for myself either. But the last one which wasn’t a real relationship and went on on and off forever one day I just didn’t care anymore. Thank god!! But the fist one the worst one on my heart when I was 20 has never fully disappeared and now I found out a week ago his wife died. I sent a condolence card. But the questions started up. Last week Wednesday I was fairly happy on my own. Love myself finally like my life well enough kinda bored lonely sometimes but pretty good. Now I’m tied up in knots. Did you just write a out 5 planets in the first house in libra with libra rising. Then that’s me. Lol. Help!! Lol

  • Carlosoalex93@gmail.com' Carlos says:

    I almost cried while reading this. God how it hurts to have your heart hurt. I almost got married to this very abusive partner. Who was a scammer, a liar, a cheat, controlling, energy vampire, and emotional manipulation. Even after I have set my boundaries from my past trauma, he still chose to demean and bilittle me. And the crazy thing is he loved bombed me. A new term I learned where they shower you with gifts and affection while disrespecting you. He would rephrase my words and always say it’s me that is making him angry or upset or unhappy. We meet in August 21 dated August 23 and then moved into my residence August 24 and asked me to marry him during us having coitus and then we got our marriage license but we didn’t get it ordained and then I had to cut it off. I offered him to leave and if he wanted to try and continue what we have but he called the cops and tried to make me look crazy. The fucked up part was I couldn’t believe someone wanted me. So I settled and then got mad at myself and cried because I didn’t know what the fuck I was doing. I’m so glad for my support of family and friends to help me pull myself out of a very dark place. It has opened my eyes.

  • Orpellimoon@yahoo.com' Crescent says:

    So right on! Just composed an email taking full accountability for an encounter and subsequent ending of a new (potential ) relationship/encounter. Had to get real with raw truth without any guarantee how my honest expression will land. And, it doesnt matter. I feel whole, in tact, empowered and complete. Freedom is the reward for honesty.

  • danielle.carifelle@gmail.com' Danielle says:

    These two also have strong roles in my chart! I am so grateful for your words of clarity around these energies. Forgiveness is important to me but I often forget to say sorry. Your words have helped me to realize I have much to heal, through forgiving myself and others, thank you! Dancing under the light of a Full Grandmother Moon with an honest heart.

  • carlottaposz@gmail.com' Carlotta says:

    I have found it is not always too late to mend a relationship. Years ago I was in a relationship that ended badly. Recently we have reconnected through Facebook and we are working on healing what happened between us. He just had a birthday and is a Libra. I am a Capricorn with moon in Libra, so this need to be real definitely rings true for me.
    PS my husband of 40 years is an Aries!

  • schmidtdiane4@gmail.com' Diane Schmidt says:

    Thanks for writing this post, Debra!! These points really resonate with me. I have struggled for many years with hanging in decision limbo. I’m Taurus sun, conjunct Mars, in the 4th house. I have people to forgive and to ask forgiveness of. I don’t really know how to go about it so I have left the endings out there hanging unaddressed. I drag these things around behind me which makes it harder to be at peace. I really appreciate reading your story and seeing how you are moving through it. Thank you for guiding us on this journey! Diane

  • celticgrl11@gmail.com' Linda says:

    I recently met a guy that is sweet as can be but I know in my heart not for me. I realized a lifelong pattern of picking “strays.” A couple I married, others I kept around until I was so anxious and began to resent them with a passion (I AM an Aries after all!) Decided that behavior stops today and I will make my true intentions be known.

  • mgdowney13@gmail.com' Maryann says:

    Hey Debra! I am a 5 times Libra and still looking for the one or did I already find him? I am soooo Libra! Beyond textbook LOL! Anyway, You described me perfectly. Thank you for your insights.

  • nikkinoelleherrera@gmail.com' Nikki says:

    Hi Debra, Thank you for sharing this. I am recently mourning a break up that happened over two months ago with my partner of 2 and a half years. I watched as we both drifted from not only ourselves but the relationship as well. He is a Gemini and I am a sagittarius. During this time we’ve been talking very on and off and I decided to send him a message pouring my heart addressing how I am blessed and love him and that I want him in my life. He has not responded. My heart aches but I feel so energetically connected to this person and accepting that maybe it’s a not now kind of thing and to just move on. The very last full moon is when he reached out and the relationship felt like it was somewhat slowly rekindling back but a very slow pace. I miss him and there’s so much love I have that I wish so badly to express to him but must do at a distance.

  • Hanniels1979@gmail.com' Hanne Nielsen says:

    im a scorpio Leo rising, Venus sag, and i have a 4 month old daughter. Her father, sun libra Venus and rising scorpio and i fell madly in love april 19, got married( and divorsed) because of all the resentment specialy in my family and caos we left behind. My oldest an aries girl did not aprove. Still doesnt. I feel Our future together depends on how theese two are willing to forgive each other and move on. I can not choose between my daughter and the love og my life

  • louiseboeger@gmail.com' Louise says:

    WOW, Debra, I am a native Libra (sun) with an Aries moon, Virgo ascending. Today, writing my morning pages I took a long time asking myself if I should go back and talk to a friend I’ve broken up almost a year ago (our friendship died in Scorpio season last year). It has already been the theme of some therapy sessions, and I have not yet gathered up the courage to do so. But, as most things in my life, I guess the moon in Aries have come to help me with that – stop planning and wondering and ACT. That subject has been showing up many times this last week, and during my birthday celebration last Friday I really missed that friend. I guess that email was one more synchronic event to help me take action. Let’s fight (with love, always – my natal Mars is in Libra too lol). Thanks for that.

  • lahayf@gmail.com' Laurie Fuda says:

    Loved this! Just last night at work I got into a heated conversation with a co-worker of mine. She is slightly above me in rank, but we’ve known each other for almost 30 years. My mouthy Mercury and Mars in Gemini got the best of me…I was pushy and in her face. Her Leo Sun didn’t like that. I was frustrated because since she’s “leadership” she is constantly complaining about how busy she is as well as management. My feeling was let me help! But when I did help, it was in an outside of the box way and didn’t go over too well. So in the middle of the night, I wrote her an email and explained myself (my Libra Moon wanted to apologise, but I didn’t). I said that I would try to do better in the future, but I was frustrated because I felt they micromanage things. That they didn’t want to delegate tasks to others because they wanted to be involved in everything. Problem is they’re so busy that things get delayed or completely forgotten. It drives me crazy!!! Anyway, we both said what we had to say. She’s still annoyed that I “overstep my boundaries”, and said my rudeness was unacceptable. I was tempted to say that it’s a good thing you don’t live in an Italian household where the way they communicate is by yelling back and forth 🙄🙄. My husband is Italian. I remember back when we were dating and he was yelling back and forth with his father about some football or baseball game and later I said to him how could you yell at your father like that? And he looked at me like I was crazy and said what do you mean? We were just discussing the game 🤷. It was so foreign to me. So anyway I know my friend would not have appreciated that comment. But the whole thing was a lesson for me. Thanks for listening 🙂. Gemini Sun 🌞, Libra Moon and Scorpio Rising. Kindly, Laurie

  • Tell me about your relationships with endings and peace. I have had my share of endings lately. I look forward to learning what a Saturn Return is all about. I am 60, divorced for 12 years, and a Capricorn, Aquarius rising, moon in Taurus. I am sorry about your ending. It is never easy even if it is necessary. Love to you. I have Lots of earth, some fire, one water and no air. I think it is because I communicate pretty well so maybe air is not an issue. Anyway, both my parents have recently died, I have overcome cancer and have ended being the workaholic I identified with my entire life until now. I love being a Capricorn as I do get younger as I go around the sun. However, I feel unsettled as I never have before. Ending the old me, finding the new. Just today, I did a writing that told me – and I quote myself and/or whoever gave me the words…. “Peace to you. Prosperity to you. It is yours. Safety is yours. Beauty is yours. Now is the time for structuring your wishes for at the first of the year you must be ready. You are well – keep your focus positive. Become who you are as you will be learning more soon. You are a powerful healer. Your gifts are about to be exposed to you. You have the words, now you need the discernment and centering. You will heal your own wounds that you do not know exist. You are very close to being free.” Well, how about those potatoes?!? You will laugh I believe, or at least I hope so – I did an exercise recently on opening up the numbers and one of the exercises was to imagine who I’d like to be and feel like what it is like to be that person. YOU came to my mind so I tried out being you. I hope that is not creepy to you. It was a compliment. I have always loved Kauai. I thought I might live there one day and you have. You are on line and I’d like to be. You are a therapist and an astrologer. I have a master’s in counseling. I am just a beginning student of astrology. You are the boss. I am the boss. We are close to the same age. I think that you are doing you a bit ahead of me doing me. I have done me for many years, but the ME is changing and that is why I seek. Thank you for helping me. Colorado Cap Girl over and out for now.

  • Rigitteb@yahoo.com' B says:

    I’d love to hear more about the “other than that” part of this conversation! I’m a Libra paired with an Aries and we often have a sort push and pull tug of war relationship but when we’re both our best it’s amazing! How can we show up for each other knowing we are opposites?

  • josephineelisabeth@gmail.com' Josie says:

    My husband and I have been separated for a couple of months now and we have two wee ones under 3. We’ve flip flopped between divorce and not divorce for months now. My heart longs for clarity and find it very difficult to pin down what I want vs. what I NEED right now, so this really hit home…

  • missthecity2@gmail.com' Cathee Denison says:

    You just described me and my husband. Me the Libra, my husband the Aries. I’m saying it’s over after 40 plus years and he’s saying why? All these years of taking care of everyone I want to take care of myself. No more anger over unmet expectations. But still a part of me doesn’t want to leave. There are many things and people at stake if we split.

  • stcy712@gmail.com' Stacy Batista says:

    Wow! My bday is Oct7th…Libra in Aries. I have never understood why I have that 2-sided feeling when it comes to relationships. I just thought I was unsettled and easily annoyed at times. Thank you for writing this. Very helpful to me personally.

  • alyeskabev322@yahoo.com' Beverly says:

    What a powerful thing, to forgive both yourself and others. Not forgetting but learning and moving forward.
    It took me a while but once you get there it is so enlightening..
    Thanks for sharing.

  • mymagicspoon@gmail.com' M says:

    Oh Debra!
    I messaged you on IG too, but I’m a Sag sun, Aries moon, Libra rising (oof and Venus in Scorpio) and I’m celebrating my 5 year anniversary tomorrow with my partner, by getting married! Civil ceremony style. No white dress, but rather a super beautiful vibrant Brazilian designer, flowers and sprinkles on cake, bubbly, kisses. I’ve been freaking out about making the commitment, not because I don’t love him, it’s just been my process, with so many things, afraid to fully commit, all the way. Then I got worried about Mercury going shadow and my heart still was singing this is the way forward. That we are learning and growing and choosing. Thank you for this super potent and appropriate share! Sending love to your heart. It says so much about the love you shared that you were able to find compassion in your truth with each other. Thank you.

  • rosalea_davis@hotmail.com' Rosa Lea says:

    thank you for the clearance to relationships in this new moon, I woke up a few days back and thought of an relationship I had two years ago, and to my amazement is back in town. I only thought about calling and apologizing before I read this, so now I really need to apologize..
    I love your book The Missing Element, have shared the test with others that were very interested as well. I appreciate your work.

    Rosa Lea

  • soudantk@mac.com' Kate Soudant says:

    I have been married twice – both times, I was the one left. Once with a small baby and no child support, the second marriage ended in the middle of house building in a foreign country when I was left in a not completed house in the country with no car, very little income and a broken heart. With both I was forced to find the wherewithal to survive on my own, while carrying both sorrow and deep anger. Years of working on myself has finally gotten me to a point where I am actually friends with both ex’s. I was able to grow and learn that I had the strength and ability to survive, without someone to lean on. I found skills, interests and abilities I had no idea I had. My life has become full, rich and I actually feel gratitude for them leaving me. (I get to tell them that every year when they call me on my birthday. Not only that, but when I hang up, I smile, again thanking that I am no longer with either of them,

  • Rubylincoln@yahoo.com' Sharon says:

    You completely just blew me away.
    Your amazing.

  • nowlincd@yahoo.com' Charlotte says:

    Excellent and beautiful read. Thank you. I’ve repeatedly tried to speak the ending openly, lovingly, honestly, and in straightforward manner. We haven’t lived together for almost 7 years now. She never lets go. Regardless of the ways I directly communicate it’s over, she pretends it’s not. I have even recently made it clear that if she won’t respect my boundaries I won’t be able to keep up a friendship with her. It’s very difficult because there is deep love here and something I can’t explain that has always been there. In so many ways we are so alike and love every moment together but there can never be true intimacy. Almost all physical intimacy is off the table with the exception of occasionally holding each other to watch a movie or holding hands once in awhile.
    Your article is wonderful because it gives me more food for thought on not only saying I’m done but actually being done which means probably walking away without even a friendship.
    But then again your words on the grass isn’t always greener is ringing in my ears. If our only issue is physical intimacy, kissing, vulnerability… Then I wonder if I’m doing the wrong thing by severing this.
    I severed it because I need affection and love. She wants me to be hers without providing that and I’ve told her it’s extremely difficult for me and hurts my heart.
    So, once again, your article is wonderful. I have verbally been very clear about my choice but she’s always so loving and kind to me and reaches out to me constantly with her caring personality and friendship. it makes it hard because I have a very deep love for her and I know she does me too.
    It’s clear reading your article that the push-pull has to stop yet I don’t know how to make it stop without cutting her completely out of my life which seems unkind and cruel.
    I I’m so afraid of making the wrong decision either way. I told her even a few days ago that regardless of how much we love each other there is no hope of a relationship because I authentically need a whole relationship in my life and she doesn’t need that part. I don’t want to try and change her and she’s beautiful the way she is but it’s not enough for me by itself.
    Then I wonder if that is me being unappreciative or thinking the grass is greener .
    I’m going to read and reread your article and pray on it. A firm choice must happen here.
    🙏🙏🙏

  • tigressa27@gmail.com' linda says:

    wow. yes. exactamundo! i’m an Aries with a Libra Rising (Sag Moon) … what a life of ups, downs and incredible adventure. but … these past few weeks, this whole year beside the pandemic and the fires (i’m in SF) … lost 4 dear friends, had to put our dog down last week (he died peacefully at 15 but man …) boyfriend got blood poisoning, and … i got fired (she was HORRIBLE mean woman, and it was a thankless job editing real estate brochures when i’m a publishing author/music writer/creative so buh-bye mean person) … at the moment i found out i was “let go” … my door bell rang and it was my downstairs neighbors with … a white orchid in honor of Mickey, our sweet boy we “put up” (my new term, instead of “put down”) … the mean boss/horrible job went away and in came a gorgeous orchid. thank you debra as always, you are such a light in this world. and now, i have a bit of a $ cushion so not desperate, at 58, my next gig will be serving the planet, her animals, the environment in some way shape or form. it must MATTER. LOVE to you! PEACE! (www.unbridledpublishing.com and https://www.facebook.com/HaightStreetVoice). Peace! And a lovely Full Moon Aries to you! Blessings!

  • Taffy.lust@gmail.com' Taffy says:

    Eloquent and timely as my ex just passed away. Our adult children are still in delusional denial…. I guess I just need to offer miore compassion, acceptance and understanding. Thank you

  • roxy_camacho2003@yahoo.com' Roxanne Camacho says:

    So I’m a sun Aries libra moon.🤣 I have been there with my ex husband had to sit with him and have a heart to heart no easy but glad I did it. Now I’m about to do it again. End a relationship that no longer serves me.

  • heatherrader38@gmail.com' Heather Rader says:

    Thankyou Debra, I truly identify with what you say, I am a Gemini sun and Aries moon, Taurus rising.
    I love the fact that the Jewish new Year is in Libra, which I hadn’t thought about, it is a good time for assessing the way we approach things. I identify with what you said about, looking over the fence and thinking there are more desirable men out there, I lost my husband last year, now I would love him to still be here.
    But now I have to continue my journey alone.
    Sadness passes, and joy is a bubbling spring which is in all the small things.

  • mkgroark@gmail.com' Mary Kate says:

    Hey Debra!
    To begin, I simply adore you! Your insights are captivating and enlightening. My moon sign is Libra and this is a new concept to me and I really think I identify with how you describe libras emotionally. I love people and making people feel good. Right now I’m trying to hold more space for myself (new goal). I also can be so indecisive! Ah. Endings and peace. I am a seasonal worker (as an indecisive human I have a lot of decisions to make, like where do I go? All the time!) I work as an outdoor educator which means I take students out backpacking and attempt to cultivate a connection to self, community, and land. We play a lot. One of my favorite parts of this lifestyle is my own community. My friends are my family and we play And share so much together! And every season there are big transitions or endings and we will move in different directions, especially now. So I have thought about endings a lot because I hate saying bye to my friends, knowing it will be months til we gather again. I think of these moments like sunsets. They are incredibly beautiful and fleeting. And I try to find peace. And I’ve learned to give myself more time in transitions if I can. Find a quiet space to collect myself and breathe thru it. Right now my goal is to allow myself to be more open to feeling, loving, and being in the moment and letting go of the future and the knowing that whatever I am currently enjoying comes to an end. Letting go of fear of losing. I’m still figuring it out. But sounds like being at peace with endings to me so thanks for being on this journey with me. Much love Deborah! – MK

  • piyannah@adr.dk' piyannah Ørnbak says:

    Dearest Debra
    I have been wondering lately about the forgiving The other part thing.
    Are we as humans really entiteled to forgive others.
    Is it my business, as nobody does anything wrong, so who am I to judge and then forgive.

    I thought of it as being too selfoverestimating like I am not in a posisition to do that.

    I can work on myself and in splitting up the best work I have come across is Conscious uncoupling
    The most beautiful way to let go of a marriage / partner.
    I love And enjoy your videos over her In Denmark
    Thank you so much
    Piyannah🙏🙌🏼

  • kerry_zbukvic@hotmail.com' Kerry Zbukvic says:

    Hello Debra, I appreciated your insights and timing for closure with your ex. I have had a problem with doing the same with my ex husband as it is over technically with a divorce to prove it, but still difficult for me to leave behind. I have joined your library which is terrific as I am a Sagittarian with moon in Cancer. {I cry a lot}
    That explains a lot already and the ex is a Pisces. This was never a match made in heaven, but parting has been difficult. I also have a copy of ‘The Missing Element’.
    The Covid 19 lockdown here in Melbourne Australia has given me time to review all of this. I thank you for the tools to help. I hope to eventually move out of this very long phase and find more peace with it. I have been interested in Astrology for many years and am loving the opportunity and time to have it explained.
    I trust your judgement as there are a lot of Astro voices out there. I am listening and learning, as well as a work in progress.
    Sincerely yours
    Kerry

  • asanilssonlifecoach@gmail.com' Åsa Nilsson says:

    Good morning Debra! Åsa here from Sweden! Thank you for sharing this.
    To give you a bit of my back ground, I am a Cancer sun, Sagittarius moon and Libra ascendant. I have had some major start overs in my life and feel like I am in the midst of creating another one soon. #offkilter
    I left the US and returned ‘home’ to Sweden after living there for 39 years. I left my family, friends, career and ex-husband in order to find me. It took me a year of alone time and quieting the noise until I found myself finally looking in the mirror and taking accountability for myself and my actions and asking for forgiveness of those that deserved it and needed it (myself included).
    I am open to endings because I know a new beginning is on its way. That to me is a beautiful circle and as long as I am living in my own authentic-ness and being as loving and kind as I can be then no matter where I am, there I am. Synchronicity.
    Love to you.
    Åsa

  • Sandy.dixon5@gmail.com' Sandy says:

    Oh, Debra – this full moon conversation definitely resonates with me! I’m a Libra sun and Aries rising. It took me a long time to get honest with what was happening in my marriage. Then I found the courage to say goodbye after 22 years.
    I didn’t know about Yom Kippur – but I do find it interesting that I reached out to my ex during this time to talk as friends.

    Thank you for bringing clarity with your words during this full moon energy. And thank you for the action step reminder of forgiveness. (Now, let’s move on to the celebration!)

  • daylan.klein@gmail.com' Day says:

    I feel that just over the last year especially this year it has solidified my love with my partner. I have always avoided commitment except with myself. I rode the fence for 2 years with my partner but man that brings alot of uncertainty and bickering. This year has become so solid for me in my relationship with him, in my continued studies and my own self care. Today on this full moon I feel grateful but a little soft, I have fought to get to where I am right now and I know I gotta keep my chi moving forward. But today and now I can just reflect with peace and clarity that I know I am exactly where I need to be and with who I need to be with. Studying the art of coaching and counselling with my love and studies of astrology. Thanks Debra for your school and news letters! ❤🔥

  • woman4@comcast.net' Kathleen Obert says:

    Your Libra friend from Shelton Wa. says thank you! You make everything make sense in my life when you explain what is going on in the Astrology world. Today will be interesting! I am a Libra married to an Aries. Never a boring life with us that is for sure. Please keep up the wonderful service you provide for people like me, who just need a little guidance to negotiate life! It is really helpful and appreciated!

  • glsummerhayes@bigpond.com' Leanne says:

    I love the way you explain things, plain English. I have learned my lessons from a traumatic break up 8 years ago. I have forgiven him (not face to face ). I’m finding my peace & enjoying it. I’m slowly learning to put myself first ( that has been a huge Struggle! I’ve always found it hard to say No, even to my own detriment. I always find insights in your readings, thanks Debra.

  • julie.locke@gmail.com' Julie Locke says:

    HI Debra,

    Thanks for the newsletter – very helpful for me. You said forgiveness does not require the other person. If I do the work do I need to even contact the person I need to forgive? or just write a a letter that I don’t send? Not sure how to complete the cycle on my own – but also see how it’s about me and my stuff. Any advice would be appreciated.

    Thanks!

  • 55Fourman@gmail.com' Sheri Foreman says:

    Good for you! My X is a Libra who doesn’t accept her responsibility in our loss of connection making this conversation unlikely. On my way forgiving myself

  • mccarty.rachel@riseup.net' Rachel says:

    I love your newsletters, Debra. They always leave me with questions to deeply sit with. Thank you.
    As for my Libra: that’s where Venus sits exactly T-square to my nodes in Cancer and Capricorn. And it’s taken me years to come to understand clearly how non-committal I am with almost everything in my life. A true resistance to endings, always struggling with transitions, even though I spent years living nomadically. Decision making has often created anxiety for me, and my pattern has been to put it off until external circumstances either force me to pick a path or choose for me. Then I wonder about what would have been on the flipside…
    That’s the shadow part of this, and I’ve also discovered the gift of being so open to various outcomes. It holds a lot of room in my life for synchronicity and Spirit’s guidance. What I’m learning is that it’s good to hold this space of openness, and I also need to pair it with doing the work of searching out my Inner Vision to become clear and to move from there. That’s the Mars calling me to action. And these lessons are coming now in these times as I watch the movement of Mars into my meadow clearing at night…
    To tie this into your newsletter, I too had a relationship end this year. After months of ambiguity on my end, he finally moved out (on the Lunar eclipse in January) and then it became clear. Seems I was struggling to let it die. And then, as you wrote, it was so much grief and blaming. This Summer we came together again as he came to visit our daughter, and I found a deep acceptance and love for who he is, who I am, and what our relationship is evolving into. Even though I still sit with questions and possibilities of what our future may look like, I am clear on the love that I hold for him as my co-parent. And I feel peace in that.

    Thank you for the reminder to lean into my Mars energy and into clarity and conviction that is being asked of me. This is truly the biggest quest of my life at the moment.

    Much love,
    Rachel

  • Rainbear26@yahoo.com' Reina Ortega says:

    When it comes to endings whether it’s personal relationships or business, when I’m done, I’m done. Normally no turning back. Luckily I’ve left every situation on excellent terms. Some bumpy at first, but resolution soon follows. Except the father of my two son’s. Left 8 years ago and we never talked about it. He’ll degrade me and my family and not take any responsibility for his actions. It’s quite sad. And draining for me mentally and emotionally, but I’m now in a space where it is what it is. I’m now preparing to cut back hours I’m involved with in a family business because it’s mentally depleted me and I can’t efficiently run my own company. Nor can I stay grounded and give myself the self-care I need. My current 5 yr relationship has had many strains put on it this past year and a half, but I’m in for the long haul. He’s kind, compassionate, has taken charge of my company in my absence, loves animals and nature. He’s not into the woo-woo like I am, but he’s accepting. And he’s adjusted to time away from me for long periods while I care for a parent. I’ve been involved with “greener on the other side” many times in my lifetime, but that grass dies too without water.

  • srminsc@gmail.com' Stephanie Martinez says:

    Does this only apply to intimate relationships? I have experienced this year the deep heartbreak of my daughter and my father deeply hurting me. My 87 yr old father choose a leach of a drug addict, theif over having family all together once again. My daughter who has narcissistic tendencies took my 8 yr old grandson to another state. She is not a mom, yes she provides food and shelter but not meaningful love to him or me. I am able to leave an intimate relationship as you described lovingly and with deep respect for what was good in the relationship and forgiving the rest. I am friends with my last 2 long term relationships.
    So tell me does this full moon energy only apply to intimate relationships?
    Thank you for all you are Debra, I’ve been following you since your days on the AM radio station here in Seattle. We’ve come a long way Baby 🤗
    In love & gratitude
    Stephanie Martinez

  • daniwhite66@gmail.com' Danielle White says:

    This is exactly how I ended my last marriage: “I want out – we’ve clearly grown apart, rather than together, so let’s get out while we can still be friends.” It was the most amicable divorce I’ve ever heard of…until after it was finalized, then the ugly started for some reason. It was in September, so it could very well have been right at the beginning of Libra, I’m not sure. We cried, we talked, called his cousin we were close to, who came over and we all cried more. He’s now re-married (they tied the knot within 2 years of the divorce), and I’m happy he found someone. I have been learning how to be in love with myself, and how to prepare for being a better partner to my next mate.

    I love your writings, and appreciate what you do; I feel so much energy and emotion from them! =)

    Tonight, during ceremony, I will be inviting my next mate to find me and let’s start a new life – I’m ready!

    Cheers, and Happy Yom Kippur!
    D-

  • gingerblitz@gmail.com' Anonymously Eternal Love says:

    I’m having trouble putting into words lately what is happening on the psychedelic internal ephemeral experience. It’s very big and it happens every minute just a beautiful synchronicity unfolding. I have a dreamweaving circle of women where we communicate all this, and stepping 12 steps back from much social media for 2 weeks has been s breath of air.
    So what I would like to say to you is your insights and personal story couldn’t resonate more with me than it did !
    including that my tears just fell before reading it because of my love for my Libra ‘wasband’ , beloved, ex that has completely ruled my life. Just.. navigated it so deeply. Karmic cords, lifetimes, 12 years together. His sun 14 Libra, my sun 14 Gemini. Oh and my Pluto 14 Libra.. the power dynamic there .. many other powerful harmonics and a couple sad squares, drama. Passion.
    So it’s been 4 years, he’s with someone, and I still
    every day I check to see what he’s doing & if he has communicated..

    The idea presented ( there’s me air sign) let me Venus Cancer that : the Feeling you had Debra of finalizing it w your previous person was profound. Like cutting off that inch of hair, that hangnail, taking their picture off your mental wall. With Grace & clarity as difficult as it is. Liberating and adult. I know this and have known this. So now I pray to the highest for the highest, and with humor because I’ve made huge strides little by little, most recently turning some corners. Yes my wonderful beloved wasband is a Libra with Aries placements and would appreciate the cord cutting idea from me but with so much diplomacy and LOVE !

  • morrowjoyce@outlook.com' Joyce Morrow says:

    I am letting go a 40 yr old marriage, it has been over 6 yrs now. How do I know that it is done?
    I am Libra dating an Aries.

  • kelkreates@gmail.com' Kelly says:

    Hi Debra,
    I am a double Capricorn, and my peaceful ending happened last year with another Capricorn. I was the primary caregiver for my father-in-law (Fil) who was afflicted with dementia. In our 30+ year relationship, we butted heads more times than I can count. Aside from our astrological mismatch, he was raised in Texas in another era, where men were dominant and women were barefoot and pregnant. And silent. He did not like strong women, thus he was never my biggest fan.

    It was a surprise to the whole family (especially me) when I became his caregiver. For nearly 3 years I guarded his finances, his health care, his personal needs. I got him set up in assisted living (he was previously homeless) and I advocated for him on every level. I noticed that as his disease progressed he became far more accepting of me, and by the end, he was calling me, “Honey” and “Sweetheart”. Those are two nicknames I would never have expected!

    Although I haven’t looked at his chart, I suspect that as his ego gradually disappeared into the fog of dementia, some of his softer traits were allowed to move to the forefront and he was able to feel true gratitude for the benevolence bestowed upon him by the Universe.

    On the day he passed away, I was the only person present in the room. I was actually on the phone with my own father when I noticed lights beginning to flash on the monitors surrounding Fil’s bed. I hung up and moved to his bedside, taking his hand, and told him that it was okay to leave; it was time for him to move on to his next great adventure. I don’t know if he heard me because he didn’t regain consciousness. He just slipped away peacefully.

    As soon as I acknowledged his transition, alarms started blaring and medical personnel began filling the room. As my last act of loyalty, I enforced Fil’s DNR request. He’d told me many times that he hoped for a painless and peaceful death, and I made it my job to make sure he got it.

    The next day I was freewriting a blog post about life lessons, and I wrote about Fil’s passing. During that exercise, I discovered that his gift to me was to show me who I really am. I am loyal, I am kind, I am generous with my time. I am both creative and innovative; during the course of his care, I had to figure out repeatedly how to resolve issues that I could never have pictured myself encountering. I discovered that I had respect for the unusual way he chose to conduct the later part of his life, even though I had repeatedly (and vocally) condemned it while he was alive. I came to understand that he lived true to his soul in spite of the fact that his lifestyle was the opposite of what society deems acceptable. It’s only now that I am beginning to understand that he was a major player in my karmic drama. And in the end, I am grateful for his participation.

    By the way, that blog post went crazy, racking up hundreds of thousands of views in a short period of time and provoking dozens of comments from people dealing with similar situations in their own lives. My willingness to be vulnerable struck a chord with so many people, yet again making me thankful for the unexpected situation in which I had found myself with Fil. I was blessed to be able to help and comfort people outside of my small social circle who truly needed to connect with my experience.

  • debbiesgi@yahoo.com' Debra Esterline says:

    Well, I’m a Sun in Libra (October 7th) with Venus in Libra. I can so relate to the Libra challenges over the years when it comes to relationships. I use to have a very hard time being on my own without having a partner in my life, even if that meant putting up with much abuse, (peace at any price). I have now, many years later, swung the other direction where I have become so fiercely independent. I would like to heal the abuse trauma from my past so that I can be open to attracting the right partner to my life who is worthy to be my partner.

  • kdesmet@comcast.net' kate12 says:

    Hi Debra — So love your take on everything astrological. Thank you for these monthly letters where you offer such great insight to help explain the movements in the heavens.

    Just before quarantine period began I flew from my home in the Detroit area to California to take part in my first-ever meditation retreat. I wanted clarity on moving forward with my plans to divorce. Last October I’d paid a retainer to a divorce attorney to get the ball rolling but I kept stopping the process because I just wasn’t sure (I’m full-on Libra). This wasn’t about feelings of romantic love and emotional attachments to my spouse. Those feelings were over years ago. It was more about my own emotional journey and a profound lack of self love. From that hollowed out sense of self I found it confusing to see myself moving forward on my own and letting go dependency on my spouse’s financial support.

    Within a day of returning home I set a date with the attorney to meet, feeling clear I was ready to file divorce papers. But 2020 rang it’s quarantine bell and everything shut down in a huge universal Time Out. I’ve used that time for even deeper meditation, and I began a deep dive into the dark places inside me to meet the fearsome “monsters” I had been running from for years.

    In the process I’ve learned that the payoff I was got from being angry, distant, unforgiving, and hard on my spouse was small, short-lived, and not worth it. I’ve learned that until I can meet myself fully in love and forgiveness I cannot meet anyone else that way. Initially I saw the year 2020 as a metaphor meaning a time for clear sight, 20/20 vision and all that. Turns out I wasn’t far off, but I didn’t realize the effort and courage it would involve to say yes to all of that.

    Now the divorce is on the back burner. The clarity I have is that I deserve to fall in love with me first and foremost (and that it is actually possible!) All else will fall into place when it does. I don’t need to force or push to make it happen. This is a 360 degree shift from where I was a year ago. 2020 has surely delivered gifts within all the upheaval.

    Thank you again for offering us your beautiful insights; I look forward to every one of them. You make sense of the planets for me in a way no one else has. I believe it comes from a deep grounding within you, and your passion for your life’s work. Many many blessings on you & your family 🙂

  • cayotedig@aol.com' Kathy says:

    Right on. I’m feeling this full moon release and new moon shift. Thanks for putting it in words. You’ve resonated we with me from the start….5 yrs ago??
    Maybe my sag venus, gemini moon and scorpio sun, cap Jupiter and Saturn.
    I’m smack in the most of truthful have to be kind decisions. I do not want to make a decision based on fear any more. I have to trust there’s no reason for it. My fear is if I let go of something to get more peace will I allow or attract something not wanted out of fear or whim. Hmm. I release the fear and open to love and kindness and understanding and my drama. Thanks debra! I appreciate you!
    Kathyb

  • nicole.bremault@gmail.com' Nicole Brémault says:

    Thank you for your caring and your clarity. I am a Gemini w Ascendant in Libra and Moon in Aquarius. At this time especially, I appreciate your reiterating that we don’t need the other person to accomplish the forgiveness work. It can be done alone.
    Also, because I have been thinking of my death, I have been sad and afraid. It is a relief to see that this the time to look at such questions. Times are not easy for me right now. Thank you for your encouraging, informative and light-hearted videos and emails.

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